Debunking Australian Stereotypes

I’m sure every country has stereotypes attached to it – like England and drinking tea; Scotland and it’s skirts/dresses kilts; America and…I’ve got nothing, but I’m sure there is something (apart from the fact that they do drive on the wrong side of the road).

But Australia has by far the WORST and STUPIDEST that I have ever seen for a country. And I am going to debunk them…with the help of my pet koala and kangaroo.

1. Australia is just one big red desert.

Um…hello? Or here:

2. Every animal is trying to kill you.

Many of the world’s most venomous snakes are found in Australia, and one of the most dangerous spiders in the world, the funnel-web, is commonly found in Sydney homes. With technology in anti-venoms and treatments, it is rare to die from a snake or spider bite in Australia.

The north of Australia is home to the world’s largest species of crocodile, the salt water crocodile. Males can occasionally grow to lengths of over 6 metres, big enough to swallow anyone whole! Each year one or two people are eaten by crocodiles in Australia. You can greatly reduce your risk of being eaten by not camping next to an enclosed riverbank that has a sign saying, ‘Warning: Crocodiles’.

[Source: https://theplanetd.com/gday-some-aussie-stereotypes/]

No, we DO NOT have crocodiles roaming our streets on a daily basis. That is an EXTREMELY, EXTREMELY rare occurrence from high flooding.

Most of our deadly animals live out in the Outback, NOT THE TOWNS/CITIES!!!

Not every single animal in Australia is deadly, like this little guy:

See? Two Australian Shepherds. Dogs. They’re not tearing us to bits, eating our brains out or anything, are they?

3. Australians are always drunk.

I’m Australian and I ain’t drunk! Never have, never will be. And that goes for all the other people in our town that I see on a daily basis on walks. As someone else said:

So what if we like to have a good time? No more than anyone else…

{Source: https://www.buzzfeed.com/bradesposito/aus-stereo}

4. All Australians eat is Vegemite for breakfast, lunch, and dinner

A lot of Australians (like others around the world) detest Vegemite. It is an acquired taste, to say the least, and is usually spread very thinly on hot buttered toast for breakfast. Tim Tams are the preferred treat of every Aussie household, chocolate coated chocolate biscuits with chocolate cream in the middle – you can’t get much better than that!

https://theplanetd.com/gday-some-aussie-stereotypes/

Okay, I love Vegemite, it is addictive, but we do have other things to eat.

5. All Australians ride kangaroos to work.

We do not ride them to school. Kangaroos and koalas rarely come into the cities, but if you venture inland to the country communities you should be able to find some. Just don’t try to pat them.

6. Every Australian can surf.

Damn, I wish I could.

7. Also, all Australians live by the beach.

Brush up on your geography. Seriously. You will find that there are plenty of towns and cities scattered throughout Australia that ARE NOWHERE NEAR A BEACH!!! The majority do live by the beach, but certainly not all.

8. All Australians are really, really tan.

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9. Australians cook all their food on a “barbie.”

What about the oven in my kitchen? Or the stove? Or a microwave?

10. It never snows in Australia, it’s just ALWAYS HOT.

Need I say more?

11. You all wear “budgie smugglers” at the beach.

No, we don’t. Some of us wear other clothes.

12. All Australians are OBSESSED with AC/DC.

My family and I HATE AC/DC.

13. All Australians drink Fosters.

My family and I DO NOT. Just stop. Get a life. I mean it.

14. Australia has no culture.

We are a MULTI-CULTURE country. It’s part of our national identity.

Please not the words “At the Australia Day parade”. And then there is art galleries, etc. We do try.

15. Australians drive on the wrong side of the road.

That’s Americans. We DO NOT. We are driving on the side of the road that the Law has stipulated we should drive on, just like every other damn country.

16. Australian only eat meat.

I eat chips, chocolate, bread, butter, potato, vegetables, pasta, cheese, etc.

JUST BLOODY STOP!!!

17. Australians live for meat pies.

I love meat pies, but I don’t “live” for it! They’re just a great snack, is all.

18. Australians also live for Tim Tams.

19. Australians wear thongs all day, every day.

It’s a summer thing and I tend to wear shoes and boots. I don’t like wearing thongs.

20. And, all Australians have a pet koala.

No, we don’t. If we want to see a koala, we go to the zoo or the bush.

Sydney is the capital, or maybe it’s Melbourne?

It’s Canberra.

Oh, and we don’t speak in slang all day, every day, all the time. I have hardly ever used Aussie slang and I have grown up in Australia. I wouldn’t know the majority of Aussie slang if I tripped over it.

You can take what I say as bona fide fact because I was born in Australia, raised in Australia and still live in Australia.

Feel free to vent about any stereotypes you have about your country that annoys you in the comments below.